Tenth Fob

On the tenth day of Christmas,
My true fob sent to me
Ten stalkers stalking,
Nine alpha entries,
Eight Mormons cussing,
Seven shoulders winging,
Six maids unmarried,
FIVE GAY SEX SCENES!
Four times a-fobbed,
Three Moral Peeps,
Two Costco cakes,
And a starling in Tehachapi.