Where have all the Fobs gone?

I was blog jumping tonight (this morning) and found myself on the old Foblog, reading "minutes" from the great summer of Fobbing. And then I returned to this so-called "new and improved" Foblog, and while I was happy to read the 12 Fobs of Christmas once again, I wondered what had happened to all my fellow Fobs. Allow me to hypothesize.

Master Fob got lost in the stacks.
Theric decided to take his "Thou Shalt Publish" speech on the road. He's playing Mississippi this week.
Jeph is dead. (That one was easy.)
Tolkien Boy quit grad school and is auditioning to be a munchkin in the stage version of Master Fob's Oz novel.
Queen Zippergut is having sex. Again.
The Marchioness found a time machine and sped off to the 1800s in search of her Mr. Darcy.
Weed got beat up on the playground.
Melyngoch hitched a ride with the Marchioness and is now being courted by Beowulf.
editorgirl. . . oh wait. I'm here.
Sir Jupiter is in orbit.
Straight Happily Married Friend of Gay Ex-Boyfriend Chick is petitioning for a better pseudonym.
Edgy Killer Bunny is buried under the stack of books that got tired of waiting on his nightstand.
And faithful Petra, our mascot? She's become the world's most famous mascot and now considers herself too busy for the likes of us.

That was fun. But I miss you. Come back.